“Everyone who comes to me and hears my words and does them,
I will show you what he is like: he is like a man building a house, who dug
deep and laid the foundation on the rock. And when a flood arose, the stream
broke against that house and could not shake it, because it had been well
built. But the one who hears and does not do them is like a man who built a house
on the ground without a foundation. When the stream broke against it,
immediately it fell, and the ruin of that house was great.” – Luke 6:47-49
In this world we have tribulations, everybody has them.
The righteous ones, the lawless ones, the holy ones just like the ungodly ones.
Storms happen. We all build the best shelter we can wherever we think it best.
But He came to make room for myself in Him, with Him as my foundation, walls
and shield. That doesn’t mean the storms avoid me, storms come just as vicious
on the house built on the rock as on the one built on the sand. I’ve built something
that will stand. I might need heavy repairs after every storm, but by His
grace, I stand.
Maker of my dreams and frame, King of everything there is
and will be, here I am. I feel like one of your disciples following You towards
Jerusalem dismayed and scared (Mark 10:32). I Want You to speak to me of Your plans
for victory, about ruling, about plans to prosper, about blessings and joy…
Hearing You talk of suffering terrifies me. An outcome where I hurt shakes my
soul within me, but Lord, my Lord, I follow. Even as I don’t understand half
the things You say or do, I follow. Even as I pray ‘please don’t let me be the
one that betrays You!’, I follow. And I know just Whom it is I follow: The One
who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross and despised shame
(Heb 12:2) In order to have me You had to endure the cross, so I won’t think the
trials I have are even worth mentioning for the joy of having You.
You thought it was all worth it, all the beatings, humiliation,
unbelief, everything. You’re worth a tear or two, a denied hope or two, a
frustrated plan or two, You’re worth all my small pains. Forgive Your daughter
for dragging her feet in hopes of prolonging the inevitable. Forgive me for
actually being tempted to command these stones to turn to bread, forgive me for
considering jumping off the high top just to see You run to catch me, forgive
me for almost considering kneeling (Matthew 4:3-11). I don’t take this hope for
granted, Lord, nor do I imagine I have attained the goal yet, but I leave
everything and follow after You. Don’t let me stumble, Maker of my feet.
Command me to come to You, and I know that after I’ll finish debating the
sanity of it in my mind, I’ll come to You even if You so happen to walk on
waters. Just never stop calling me Lord and always give me voice to answer like
Luther did, “Here I stand. I cannot do otherwise. God help me. Amen.”
I’m out of breath, kneeling on the shores of this sea that
stretches endlessly before me with the enemy right behind me, ready to attack.
Heart beating so frantic that my chest feels about ready to crack open. Ears
ringing from the sound of the waves and armour. I’m ready to panic any moment
now, but I still hear a whisper through all the chaos, “steady, child!”
Lord, You know every step I took to bring me this far. Steady
my feet, steady my heart, steady my faith. I know You can split the sea in
front of me and I could walk right through… then I’d sing like Miriam… But I
don’t have enough faith or vision to see myself on the other side yet. If the
sea will split, it won’t because I believed it into splitting, it will be
because you chose to. All I know, Lord, is that whether the sea will split or
not, You’re still my God, my King, my all. So just in case I don’t make it to
the other side, this is the song I’ll sing You this side of the unsplit sea.
My heart is split in two.
What the maidservant could not see by the water
Like a storm from the sea, it pounds
Like Miriam's timbrel, it beats.
And there is no cure in the world.
My heart surrenders
Stumbles, can no longer stand on its feet
Just a wreck with no purpose
And the sky is like a wall to me
How can I pass through the sea on dry ground
And only You can turn my mourning into dancing
To purify the sand
To soften all in me
And only You know how to approach my heart
You lessen any pain within me
You heal my heart
My heart is split in two
Half of it is guilty, and half of it is for the sake of
Heaven
